Modeling Dumas

First portion: Dumas’ description of Dantès on page 106 in the first and second full paragraphs

It includes a lot of comparative description to evidence physical, mental, and emotional changes in Dantès life. The description has a “flowing” feel, beginning with anaphora and going on to other specific descriptions.

1. Her eyes, though bright, held a slight cloudiness from the hardships of those difficult years. Her hands, with faded calluses, remembered the many mornings she mopped up the floors for her grandmother. Her cheeks, once so relaxed with a hint of baby fat, were now a thinner frame for a bittersweet smile. The silent strength she gained from those endless mornings of caregiving was reflected in her assured, but open stance. Optimism mixed with seriousness was the mark of each comforting reply she gave to her grandmother.

2. Their play clothes were traded with clingy, revealing outfits. Their mouths, once producers of fairy tales and unrestrained invitations, were now plastered with lip-gloss pouts. Their once wild, pig-tailed hair was now constantly being curled, straightened, and coated with special products for others’ approval. Every facial and body expression showed an attitude of testing rebellion. Makeup was a mask for the emptiness and insecurity that infested their teenage bodies. In those moments alone, they were not able to hide themselves from the loss of their tree house days.

3. His shoulders were stiff from the clenching feeling in his chest. His fingers, which used to float across the piano keys with the sound of his daughter’s voice, were now clenched into fists of sorrow. His legs, once a chair of comfort and laughter, now shuffled to the beat of sobs. Shadows under his eyes marked the nights he woke up from dreams where his daughter smiled and reached out her vaporizing hand to his solid one. Grief was the cloak he wore to avoid all life except for the buried one he focused on.

Second portion: King Louis XVIII’s joke about the weather on page 47

This corny sense of humor in the dialogue made the characters and their relationship seem more real to me. Corny comments, puns, and skewed responses pop up everyday in conversations with family and friends. This sense of humor can be pretty ridiculous and receives reactions of annoyance, lightheartedness, or awkward courtesy laughs. [Random writer’s note: These sets of dialogue show a really weird sense of humor. You might not even understand the “jokes” behind them.]

1. “Can I have half your hot dog?”

“Only if you can mustard up some money to give me in return.”

2. “I absolutely love this cake. I just can’t get over how amazing it is.”

“If it’s so perfect, then why don’t you marry it?”

3. “I ran into my high school history teacher yesterday!”

“I hope you didn’t get hurt.”